Surprise!!!

Or not. If you know me very well at all, you know that I CAN NOT plan anything for Justin. I always tell him what he's getting for Christmas (usually by making him open is presents early), etc. Well, the same is true for his birthday, and this year is no exception. I have been planning a surprise party for him for about a month now. I bought invitations, snuck around to get addresses, and even handed out invitations when him and I went places, all without him knowing. I thought for sure he had seen me hand them out, or had heard me talking about it with the would be guests. Well, it's no longer a surprise. I'm me, and me being me, opened my mouth. I have this worry that even though I invited around 30 people, and even more by e-mail/verbal invite, no one will show. Horrid flashbacks of our attempted Halloween party keep going through my mind. This fear got the best of me last night. I was being quiet, which is somewhat unusual, and Justin kept asking me what was wrong. I denied that anything was wrong for a bit, but I broke down. My defenses were down, I was down, and I caved. I told him. I told him about the party and about my fears. I told him about all my plans and how I had been sneaking the invites, hiding food that was to be prepared, and how his dad was going to get him out of the house. So, in true Janae fashion, I ruined the surprise. The party will still be a blast, and I'm hopeful that more people will actually come this time. I'm actually quite proud that I was able to keep it from him for a month. I mean, really, I'm the girl that shows up with his Christmas present in the trunk, vowing to not say a word, only to pull in the driveway and drag him out of the house to see it. I'm the girl that last Christmas, stuffed stockings 2 weeks early, and then begged him to empty his a day later. I'm that girl. After I told him, I laid in bed and thought about how the events of the evening unfolded. I remember that one of the things on my list is to surprise Justin. This made me regret telling him...but only for a split second, because I then remembered that I have already surprised him! That's right, my big mouth self surprised Justin. Here's the story. Last audit season was hard on me, being pregnant and all. One evening, my grandma offered to keep Kendra, so I took her up on it. Justin was in Goodland, and I decided to drive down and see him. So, after work, I dropped Kendra off, filled the tank with gas, and headed out. I called one of his co-workers and got his room number. I talked to him on the phone as if it were any normal day. I was even on the phone with him when I pulled into the hotel parking lot. So, I told him I had another call, hung up, and ventured up to his room...and he truly was surprised to see me. Mark that one off the list. So, even though this surprise is ruined, I have proven that I can do it...as long as I don't plan ahead too much!!

PS - He had a pretty good idea what was going on. He saw me talking to people after he would walk away, and over heard a potential guest on Saturday talking to me. So, see, it's not all my fault!